"Do you miss him?" KC asked after I agreed that a man in a restaurant in Manhattan bared a striking resemblance to a guy I was with the other night. "No" I replied and thankfully cut myself short of saying what else had popped into my head, that being "but I wouldn't mind having his face between my legs again." I don't miss him. We've only been on the road a few days and before last weekend, it had been weeks since the last time he and I hung out. I do like him, though. I think he's becoming a pretty good friend. It's good to be able to say whatever to another mental case.

It figures he'd still be hung up on her. Actually, it makes perfect sense. As I begin to weigh my options, of course I would choose one (or more) that is clearly attracted to me, but still wishes that really I was someone else. That way, it can't develop into anything. I don't want anything to develop into anything right now, except to cultivate some better friendships. Some of them with benefits.

I do worry, though, that in making such choices I might end up passing on something that could be great. I suppose I'll worry about that when (IF) it happens. Hopefully I'll recognize the potential instead of just screwing it up, but then again, if I could screw it up that easily, there wasn't much potential to begin with.

There are people I do miss, but I don't think that has anything to do with being in a van, and more to do with never actually calling anyone.

"You do like what I'm doing."

Yes. I sure did.

Four years ago I was leaving for, I think, my first tour ever. I'm not sure what number this one is.