"You don't have to push me! I just got off stage!"
I just blurted it out. It was the same privileged, self-important attitude I had been bitching about all night, but I was so angry. So many wankers walking around thinking they're something special (and in some cases, I'm sure they were) simply because they were invited to schmooze at a music festival. A festival that wouldn't exist without musicians. Have some fucking respect.
Of course the situation in particular was my fault. I should've known that going out for a smoke after my set would mean I was trying to get back inside at the same time as a huge group of people trying to get in to see Wintersleep. What was I thinking? I don't know what I was thinking, but I know I was trying incredibly hard to be polite and courteous and most other people were not putting in a similar effort. Some were. Some were amazingly nice. But it's always easier to remember the negative than the positive.
I got outside and immediately starting ranting/shouting to myself about the privileged motherfuckers when a stranger came over to ask why I was upset and to say he enjoyed the set. I explained that I'm not used to all this industry stuff and I'd give anything to play a DIY basement show again. Talking with him cheered me up quickly and we both headed for the door once the cigarettes were gone. Apparently, someone in line knew him, and moved aside to let him in, but closed the gap to cut me off. I politely stood my ground, letting the people in front of me show their ID's to get in, but inching my way to the door beside the line. I had beer in there. And international delegates I had to talk to. Fahey needed an interview.
That's when some chick behind me pushed ahead and dug her elbow into my arm and I blurted out that I was more important than her. I'm still a few people back, and I'm still patiently allowing the ones in front to do what they have to do. Next thing I know, those girls up ahead get in, and the line moves up, pushing me back once again. That is when I couldn't take it anymore. I lifted my arms and laid both of my hands on the female beside me. Putting all of my might into it, I shoved her as hard as I could, creating a domino effect as a bunch of girls in stupid heels in the snow toppled out of my way and I barged back inside.
The whole night was filled with me trying to be on my best behaviour, but being tempted to be on my worst. Standing at the side of the stage, waiting for my keyboard stand, I very nearly spit on She Who Must Be Destroyed. I hadn't seen her in a long time, I couldn't even be sure that it was her, but my reaction was as spontaneous as when I gagged in the kitchen after rinsing out a beer can from New Year's Eve that I had found near the bathroom. The gob was actually slipping through my lips when I came to my senses and sucked it back in.
It wasn't all bad, don't get me wrong. I got to see some people I hadn't seen in awhile, including my ex's sister that I hadn't spoken to in over a decade. I guess we both felt awkward around each other thinking one hated the other, when really it's just that she hated her brother and we met through him. I was great having Tom, Christian, and Emily in Fredericton. I absolutely love the guys in Wintersleep. No, it wasn't all bad, but it wasn't easy. I love playing shows, but I hate the industry bullshit so very, very much.
The next day was much better. Some afternoon hangouts with our guys followed by an interview with Scott Kitchen and then an all ages show. I always enjoy the interviews with Scott. I especially like going through the music library and picking our own stuff to play. I played the Pointed Sticks song that had been in my head all week. We also played a song off the Lost Boys soundtrack, since it had somehow come up in conversation and they actually had the record at the station. Nancy played Daniel Johnston and KC picked a bunch of stuff.
(Free) Beer was hard to come by, but there was more than enough Red Bull everywhere. Ew.
An interesting weekend. I am certainly glad to be home, getting ready to clean my room.
"I never ever wanted to get too close to you I didn't want to fall in love."
Last year I was forced to get out and socialize for the first time in ages thanks to a Hold show at the Speakeasy.
I just blurted it out. It was the same privileged, self-important attitude I had been bitching about all night, but I was so angry. So many wankers walking around thinking they're something special (and in some cases, I'm sure they were) simply because they were invited to schmooze at a music festival. A festival that wouldn't exist without musicians. Have some fucking respect.
Of course the situation in particular was my fault. I should've known that going out for a smoke after my set would mean I was trying to get back inside at the same time as a huge group of people trying to get in to see Wintersleep. What was I thinking? I don't know what I was thinking, but I know I was trying incredibly hard to be polite and courteous and most other people were not putting in a similar effort. Some were. Some were amazingly nice. But it's always easier to remember the negative than the positive.
I got outside and immediately starting ranting/shouting to myself about the privileged motherfuckers when a stranger came over to ask why I was upset and to say he enjoyed the set. I explained that I'm not used to all this industry stuff and I'd give anything to play a DIY basement show again. Talking with him cheered me up quickly and we both headed for the door once the cigarettes were gone. Apparently, someone in line knew him, and moved aside to let him in, but closed the gap to cut me off. I politely stood my ground, letting the people in front of me show their ID's to get in, but inching my way to the door beside the line. I had beer in there. And international delegates I had to talk to. Fahey needed an interview.
That's when some chick behind me pushed ahead and dug her elbow into my arm and I blurted out that I was more important than her. I'm still a few people back, and I'm still patiently allowing the ones in front to do what they have to do. Next thing I know, those girls up ahead get in, and the line moves up, pushing me back once again. That is when I couldn't take it anymore. I lifted my arms and laid both of my hands on the female beside me. Putting all of my might into it, I shoved her as hard as I could, creating a domino effect as a bunch of girls in stupid heels in the snow toppled out of my way and I barged back inside.
The whole night was filled with me trying to be on my best behaviour, but being tempted to be on my worst. Standing at the side of the stage, waiting for my keyboard stand, I very nearly spit on She Who Must Be Destroyed. I hadn't seen her in a long time, I couldn't even be sure that it was her, but my reaction was as spontaneous as when I gagged in the kitchen after rinsing out a beer can from New Year's Eve that I had found near the bathroom. The gob was actually slipping through my lips when I came to my senses and sucked it back in.
It wasn't all bad, don't get me wrong. I got to see some people I hadn't seen in awhile, including my ex's sister that I hadn't spoken to in over a decade. I guess we both felt awkward around each other thinking one hated the other, when really it's just that she hated her brother and we met through him. I was great having Tom, Christian, and Emily in Fredericton. I absolutely love the guys in Wintersleep. No, it wasn't all bad, but it wasn't easy. I love playing shows, but I hate the industry bullshit so very, very much.
The next day was much better. Some afternoon hangouts with our guys followed by an interview with Scott Kitchen and then an all ages show. I always enjoy the interviews with Scott. I especially like going through the music library and picking our own stuff to play. I played the Pointed Sticks song that had been in my head all week. We also played a song off the Lost Boys soundtrack, since it had somehow come up in conversation and they actually had the record at the station. Nancy played Daniel Johnston and KC picked a bunch of stuff.
(Free) Beer was hard to come by, but there was more than enough Red Bull everywhere. Ew.
An interesting weekend. I am certainly glad to be home, getting ready to clean my room.
"I never ever wanted to get too close to you I didn't want to fall in love."
Last year I was forced to get out and socialize for the first time in ages thanks to a Hold show at the Speakeasy.
posted by crystal at
12:57 pm
3 Comments:
Sometimes it's fine to be a tyrant - especially when you write something hilarious and honest about it afterward.
By
Kate Savage, at 11/2/08 11:53 am
Thanks, it was fun.
By
crystal, at 12/2/08 7:30 am
Also, when I intro'd "Out of Luck" I said "out" in a weird way. Kind of like that line "I'm gonna give you the best blow-jay ever, with my Ma-ow-th."
By
crystal, at 12/2/08 7:32 am
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